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Relationships are an aspect I have found to be within remarkable flux for me. In this path, I have learned that every aspect of my life worth having, is worth some solid review. Look long, deep, and hard at each relationship to determine if it really serves you. And this has caused me a fair amount of stress, anxiety, and sadness.

It has been a challenge for me, as I now know many more of my own truths with which to bring to my relationships. Several of the relationships I have created since I started on this path have proven their strength. But to be fair, there was no real change there. We started our interaction once I accepted that I was a Shaman, a Pagan, a Healer, and an Energy Worker. But I have friends that I have had for a long time, and although many of them are wonderful, loving, accepting people, the relationships have suffered.

Time and time again, I literally feel like the friends I have held for years have forgotten about me. This past year has been the hardest of my life, and I saw only that friends were drying up, and not responding. (This sounds like a depression rant, and that is not at all the goal here.)

I have been asked multiple times in the past few months about why I was being so quite. And it didn’t actually click for me until this past Sunday, at Michigan Paganfest, with my Allyu, as to why I had been so quite. In the past 6 months, there have been very few of my friends that actually keep in communication, and of those 3 or 5 people, I feel that discussing what is hard, would simply burden them unnecessarily. Sitting with my Allyu, and my mentor, I realized that there is no aspect of this struggle that I need to hide, as they have experienced it too. And it got me to start really thinking on the relationships I have again.

Even those with whom I would like to share my new truths, are truly remarkable individuals, who are so busy in their own lives, and in a way that has nothing to do with me, have no time available. But timing is interesting. In the past 6 months, I would say 75% of the people I consider close, simultaneously got too busy.

This is a hard lesson to learn. I find that I will continue to think, and try to connect, but I need to start acknowledging that these could dry up for good. A relationship cannot exist, without that sacred reciprocity. It must give in both directions.